As I mentioned, using Bob and Peter as our ‘darling
attackers’ gave us a valuable opportunity to evaluate acquired skills and observe
how the male body naturally responds to various self-defense moves. This
experience not only boosted our confidence but also offered insights into how
to swiftly adapt to and control the situation amid strikes, which are often
delivered in rapid, hard-to-counter sequences.
It was funny to see how anxious those two young
men were about their susceptible source of masculinity, flinching at the
slightest threat. Most revealing was that, even after a mild contact on their wrinkly
little bag of pain, they always reacted quite tellingly: freezing briefly,
crying out loudly, that it hurt terribly, or singing at a high pitch while
frantically hopping around, as if trying to shake off the pain. These
scenes were already quite amusing, but when our hits landed with good precision
and enough power, their reaction became even more dramatic: dropping to the
floor like a sack of potatoes, then instantly writhing like a worm just pulled
from the ground with very intense vocal expressiveness. We obviously felt sympathy for them, but even
though it might sound cruel, their testicular discomfort served an important
purpose. Linda directed us to observe closely and take notes because it was an
essential part of our training.
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| Common pose of a man after a successful testicle strike |
It wasn't difficult to notice that they
frequently adopted a peculiar position—on all four, hunched over with knees on
the ground, legs slightly apart, and hands covering the crotch, to guard or perhaps
to check if their precious jewels between the legs were still there. Linda
explained to us that the double-up effect is a natural reflex caused by sudden,
strong stimulation of the vagus nerve. The referred abdominal pain and nausea
make it impossible to stand upright, prompting them to adopt a more comfortable
position to ease the initial shock and radiating pain. She even had a fitting
term for it: ‘playing a startled bullfrog.' It indeed resembles a famous yoga
pose, but something else is important. Usually, knocking a guy to the ground
after a successful testicle shot means a decisive victory, allowing the victim
to just fix her hair, walk away, and call for help (or an ambulance for him); however,
Linda emphasized that it is always better to finish the job. Even if the
attacker is in severe pain and temporarily incapacitated, the threat might
still remain, as the attacker could recover and go after you due to anger and
pumped-up adrenaline. Additionally, the primary goal is not only to ensure your
safe escape but also to effectively stop the rapist from continuing his sex crime
career. That's why one of Linda's mottos was exactly the title of this post: ‘Never
leave a job unfinished’. She demonstrated a variety of finishing techniques applicable
to different positions and situations. I have already mentioned the power of stomping
or ‘mashing the potatoes’ of a lying attacker. So, what should be done about
the guy in the mentioned bullfrog pose?
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| Kick won't transform a bullfrog into a prince. |
During one class, Laura's perfect knee strike
turned Bob into a little blond Frog Prince, giving Linda a chance to
demonstrate one of her most lethal finishing moves in real. “Come closer and
take a look...” she called out as she squatted beside him, leaning over and
pressing her left hand against his back to keep him steady. With her other
hand, she gently moved around his buttocks and between his thighs to pinpoint
the area. “As you can see, Bob’s partly defensive position also unintentionally
exposes part of the back of his scrotum. The most sensitive spot is actually
quite exposed, almost inviting exploitation.” She pulled the fabric of his
shorts, revealing that the bulge consisted of two orbs peeking out just below
his bubble butt, completely unprotected. She gently tapped the bulge to
demonstrate how sensitive the soft tissue is. Bob sighed quietly, not from
pain but rather from surprise.
Linda stood
up to continue her demonstration. “One of the deadliest approaches here is the
free kick, like in football. He is down, you are already standing, and want to
flee, but you should still bid farewell to his testicles. With the kick,
visualize sending one of his balls all across the room. The striking point is
the toe box of your shoe or the tips of your toes. Get quickly into the right
distance, not too close, not too far, something like this… Position your leg between
his legs, step back, arch your dominant leg for maximum momentum, then kick
with full power, pointing the striking area forward. In this case, don't go up
but go through instead, visualizing the target much further ahead.” She
mimicked the full kick to show the mechanism, but luckily for Bob, at the end,
she rapidly decelerated her foot and made only slight contact with the bulge
with the tip of her sneaker. It was as if she probed the fragile tissue to test
its liveliness. And based on Bob's reaction, clearly it was! “And now you want
to kiss the prince again…” She repeated the whole sequence, from arching the
leg to close contact. Bob had a poor view of what was happening and knew that
if she had not stopped the foot at the right time before impact, his manhood
and future reproduction would be over, forever. Linda explained further
explained unapologetically, “One resolute kick is normally enough. When
possible, it's best to do it as many times as possible, with the intention of
completely disabling what's inside the bag. Even if he futilely tries to cover
it with his hands or close his thighs, it is of no avail, as the tip of your
shoe has very strong penetrating power and is pointy enough to reach the
target.”
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| Cute white sneakers can be a formidable weapon |
“OK, let's have
a little practice. Warning! Be super careful, you stop for just a little poke
at the end, you don’t want to hurt Bob, don’t you?” Linda looked down with a smile
at the little handsome poor Prince Frog, whose angry yet surrendering face
looked back at her. She then turned to Peter, who was standing to the side and,
until now, had been a lucky observer. Just Linda's commanding look was enough;
no words were needed. He knew he couldn't escape being part of our training, so
without protest, he joined Bob and got on all fours to serve as a second
darling attacker and a test bullfrog specimen…
