Learning through drawing – diversity of male anatomy (part 1)

This summer was extremely hot, and with Tom, we decided to cool off at a local lake. The place is usually very crowded, but we found a calmer, shaded place. While Tom was having a nap, I got bored reading a book and started to look at the people walking by and bathing. It was fascinating to see different people and their body types, and in men, bulges with visibly varying content. It immediately reminded me of one memorable class with Linda that really stuck in my mind—a hilarious lesson on male anatomy and, believe it or not, visual art…

Linda always managed to surprise us
with some bizarre tasks.  

After some intense exercise and practicing kicking, Linda called her sweaty and gasping girl squad "You did well today," then gave us unexpected homework: "I want you to draw your boyfriend's" genitals, both testicles and penis, in a relaxed and erect state on an A4 sheet, aiming for true depiction and detail, and bring your creation to the next class." There was a brief moment of complete silence. We looked at each other with a mix of awe and confusion, finding it extremely odd, having difficulties seeing any connection to self defense training. Then I heard some chuckles and even a weak "What?!" and  "No way!"

Yet, as we have learned many times before, Linda's bizarre demands and exercises often made sense in the end, and protesting would be futile anyway. Tania, obviously without a boyfriend, was asked to draw a random naked man she could find online. Although we were initially a bit baffled, we all left the dojo motivated to do our best to accomplish the task. Walking down the street after saying bye to my classmates, I realized how fascinating and revealing this psychological experiment might be.  

A secret snapshot of Tom's morning wood enabled
me to get the image of his aroused genitals.  

It wasn’t as easy as it first seemed; the problem was not that we were not a bunch of Picassos, sure, we could all do some simple sketch from memory, but getting the exact proportions and appearance was almost impossible without having real genitals in front of us, staying still as a model. We often handle them during intimate activities, but neither measure nor conduct detailed anatomical studies on them. Ideally, we could simply ask our guys to pose for us, letting us take time to do it properly. But who would be willing to reveal the real purpose of this highly unusual activity, with a sole focus on the external reproductive system instead of his Greek statue-type torso?  Then I also realized that the truthfulness of the depictions could be highly questionable. I suspected that some girls would like to show off and consciously or maybe unconsciously exaggerate the real size of their partner's manhood.  Who would not want to have a hung man and take pride in it, even if it means strutting in borrowed plumes? On the other hand, it is understandable that none of us wants to be embarrassed by having a sex partner with a pathetically tiny penis.

I was deeply worried about possible Tom's inquiries, why I was doing this, and whether it had anything to do with that “weird” self defense course. Rumors about Linda's unconventional pedagogical and training methods were spreading throughout the university. I wanted to protect his sensitive, innocent soul from such cringe, but at the same time, I was determined to complete the assignment responsibly, regardless of its peculiarity. Ultimately, I decided on a sneaky approach: to use my phone to secretly take a quick snapshot of him when he was leaving the shower—that would be for the flaccid state. In the morning, before waking up, he almost always gets morning wood. By gently removing his pajamas, it was the perfect time for another unsuspected snapshot to capture the changes in his aroused state. This allowed me to take time when he was not home to study all his anatomical features and reproduce his private parts into a drawing. I admit, my artistic skills are limited, so I inevitably produced a huge pile of crumpled paper rubbish. I tore the unsuccessful attempts into small pieces and threw them into the garbage outside so Tom would not find them.

Artistic drawing is not easy,
but in the end, I was satisfied. 

Once I was done, not to lie, I was quite proud of my work. I couldn’t wait any longer for the next class, not only to see other girls' creations and what kind of man’s equipment they reproduced, but also to understand the purpose of the whole thing. On the day of the class, I found myself rushing to the dojo as if I had never done before, having carefully folded the precious art piece and hidden it well in my handbag. My heart was pounding with great suspense.

Exactly as I suspected, just entering the dojo suggested that this class was going to be fun. Some girls couldn't control themselves and, before receiving any instructions, proudly showed their intrigued peers their artwork, peppering it with funny stories about how they managed to capture visuals of their darlings’ jewels and what kind of tricks they had to invent, which caused a lot of frantic giggling and some highly ungirly remarks. I do not blame them; none of us wanted to fail Linda's assignment. We noticed Bob and Peter did not come, so that somehow indicated that the things we were going to learn were not for their innocent ears or eyes, which only added to our excitement to the point that we did not notice Linda had just arrived. Hearing the loud chatter and vim, she did not let us wait long; this time, she even skipped the regular warm-up exercise, which was quite unusual.

“I see you are quite impatient. So let's check how you managed your assignment,” Linda asked us to sit down in a semicircle around her on the mat, and we did so quickly, filled with anticipation. She then gave instructions for the next activity. “I want each of you to go one by one, show the other girls your drawing, and then describe your partner's male organs in words. You can, for example, compare them to various fruits or other everyday objects if that helps. Comment on shape, size, skin, pubic hair, and other important features.”

We had a lot of fun showing
our creations to our classmates.

It was great that Ana was the first to present, since she's naturally outgoing and not too shy. Without hesitation, she confidently held up the sheet for us to see her boyfriend's genitals, using her finger to point out the parts she was discussing, just like a teacher addressing her class.

 “Well, as you see, these are my boyfriend's testicles and penis. I call his testicles bolas because they are perfectly round balls that usually hang really low, swinging vigorously like two pendulums. You obviously can't see it here, but even a small flick causes great discomfort, which I often shamelessly take advantage of.”

After these words, we all burst into laughter, but Ana continued, “They like to move up and down depending on the temperature and the intensity of my petting. His penis is like... let's say, a cucumber, I mean, when relaxed and unused like a typical pickle, but it can elongate to become long and thick, like those used in salads,” she proudly pointed at the drawn erect penis.

“They are actually called English cucumbers,” interrupted Susanne, eager to show off her culinary knowledge.

“Does it also taste sour?!” Laura's unexpected inquiry made us laugh again.

“No, at all, it is very succulent and delicious,” replied Ana with all seriousness.

Artistic representation of
Tom's erect penis 

 It sounded like a pubertal locker room banter we used to have in high school, but Linda let us have some fun and did not interrupt the ongoing cheerful chat. At the end of her talk, she praised Ana for her drawing and vivid description. The details she managed to capture were excellent; she depicted the deep crevices on the relaxed scrotum, long prepuce protruding from the penis end, and she made a great effort to illustrate a lot of long curly pubic hair covering the whole area.  

Now, when the ice was broken, the other girls enthusiastically followed her path, and we all fought to give the best presentation of our better halves' most precious body parts, intermitted with some more or less inappropriate remarks.  Some of us are naturally shyer than others, and expressing ourselves in such a tense situation was not always easy. Luckily, Linda managed to create a nonjudgmental, lively atmosphere. When the talking stalled and we groped to find the right words, she encouraged the audience to ask concrete questions, such as the estimated penis's length, girth, or volume of the testes. 

There were some memorable moments, such as when Laura was honest about the size of her boyfriend's penis in the flaccid state and called it a fat earthworm. Or when Tania presented a drawing of a male pornstar with a huge penis, which was circumcised—none of our boys are. The unusual curvature of Rebeca’s boyfriend's penis also drew a lot of attention, as well as an unusually tight scrotal sac. Susanne, as always, was very precise and used the correct medical terminology as much as possible; sometimes, we had no clue what she was talking about.  Some presented privates were clean-shaven, some bushy, some penises were truly on the shorter side… but we were absolutely not judgmental.

To be honest, most presented flaccid penises
were of the shape and size of a small pickle

I admit, I was very nervous when it was my turn, but I think it went quite well in the end. I described Tom's testicles as of normal size, resembling two ripe figs just fitting into my hand, and his penis, which does not impress at first sight, but when it gets aroused, it becomes a fat sausage, revealing a cute red strawberry-like glans. Listeners noticed the thick vein running along the penis shaft, which I managed to detail well. Don’t want to sound too self-appreciative, but I was also happy I got appraised for my artistic outcome, maybe not the best, but memorable for sure😉.

After we finished the round, Linda expressed her satisfaction with the well-played-out first exercise stage. “Now tell me. What have you noticed?” she asked us.

“Oh, we are actually very talented artists!” exclaimed Emma naively.

“No doubt about it”, Linda nodded, with a bit of an ironic tone and a smile on her face. “And what else?“

“Our boyfriends are all well-equipped real men!” Laura rushed to a somewhat dubious conclusion, possibly knowing this was not what Linda expected, but trying anyway.  

 Clearly not getting the right answer, Linda grinned and repeated, “Do not want to argue on that, I leave the judgment to you, but what else?”

“There is a high variability among the male genitals, in type, size, volume, how low they naturally hang, and how they react to arousal…even though the sample size was just six.” Finally, rational Susanne understood Linda's direction and answered correctly.

 “Exactly!” Linda agreed. The natural diversity of male reproductive organs in many aspects, not only shape and size, is remarkable, which has very important implications for self defense, more than you ever thought. You might choose a boyfriend and his genitals, but not your attacker. The knowledge of male anatomy and its variables and utilizing it to your advantage is one of the essential elements of my system, but it also involves a significant change in a woman's mindset.” Linda said in an almost preaching voice.

Our guru then announced the continuation of the exercise. “Now, put all the drawings in this box, and each of you draws one piece. Then imagine it as an attacker's genitals in front of you. Explain to your peers which technique you would choose and why it would be the most effective for the given type of organs.”

An awkward moment of silence followed.  We knew it was going to be a weird class, but like this? OK, one thing is to show some naughty drawings, and the other one is to listen to how your friends would batter our loving partner's precious sex organs. These were not just some anonymous imaginative drawings of some bad guys' junk, but our lovelings.

“Ana, again, you go first,” ordered Linda. Ana, this time, more hesitatingly drew a first paper and tried her best to explain the details of how she would injure Emma's boyfriend's testicles as well as his penis.

Linda often exhausted us not only
physically but emotionally as well

Now on, we all had to listen to gut-wrenching explanations of snapping penises to induce penile fracture, testicle twisting to induce torsions, and flattening the glands to mushy nothing. We got the opportunity to show all the knowledge of the most destructive techniques we learned from Linda, including the vivid descriptions of exposed penis heads being pepper-sprayed or bitten off completely  The saggy testicles were pulled till the cords inside snapped; tight testicles were punched in an upward motion to crush them against the hard pelvic floor.  Ironically, a long penis and sizable, low-hanging testicles were no longer a sign of male pride but rather a fatal weakness and a disadvantage for the owner.

This was an emotional rollercoaster. Instead of shooting  some funny remarks, we naturally became defensive and even shouted things like “Do it to your boyfriend's junk!” I also almost went nuts when I heard Rebeca saying that Tom's testicles would be ideal for a ‘handmade’ fig jam and that his cute little soft, strawberry-like penis head she would ruthlessly pinch with her long nails till separated from the stem. I looked at her with depreciation and hoped to get a chance to ‘return the favor’, which I luckily got.

I think we all felt relieved when it was over. Linda, while showing an expression of mixed irony and satisfaction, let us digest the exercise and cool off a bit. Suddenly, Bob and Peter appeared, staring in disbelief, or rather shock, at the pile of bizarre, often rather amateurish anatomical studies scattered on the floor, and at us, sitting emotionally exhausted. They had no idea the game we played, but feared they soon were going to get involved in some unorthodox ones, and their poor genitals were going to play an important part inevitably… 

Blind, choke, desex! 👀(first part)

Over time, I noticed that some readers of my blog might have gotten the wrong idea that Linda focused her training solely on techniques related to the testicles. As a result, both she and I were accused of having an unhealthy obsession with this area and hatred towards men. However, this is far from the truth. She taught us a comprehensive self defense system, in which the vulnerability of the testicles is just one, albeit important, element. I do realize that my bold and sometimes cheeky writing style may make some readers uncomfortable, but my intention isn't to shy away from such important, often life-saving topics. I aim to share what I learned from Linda’s course openly, which was based on her research findings, real-life experience, and extensive reviews of successful cases, suggesting that targeting the testicles provides the best opportunity for effective defensive counteractions.

Man's eyes can be beautiful, but also important
"high balls" target in female self defense

Linda trained us to handle various attack situations, equipping us with a comprehensive set of physical and psychological techniques and strategies. A key part of the course was to develop a thorough understanding of the male body and how to target its vulnerabilities, both physical and mental. Linda consistently emphasized that every man has delicate "crown jewels"—two high balls (eyeballs), two low balls (testicles), and a small protruding apple from the neck. All are very fragile, breakable, and arranged along the center of the body at a comfortable distance.

Every man fears losing them, protects them anxiously, and our task was to learn how to create the perfect unexpected “jewel heist”. Do you remember Linda's ideal deadly sequence for dealing with a dangerous attacker: “Blind him first, then choke him, and before saying bye-bye, desex him! He cannot rape you if he cannot see, cannot breathe, and cannot breed!”. Who wouldn’t love her hilarious mottos, mnemonics, and metaphors!

Following the recommended sequence to shut down all vital functions may not always be possible. Some sensitive spots may be more or less accessible, or not accessible at all, during different stages of an attack or in various situations. To open the window of opportunity, the principles of distraction and deception are therefore crucial. I already wrote about Adam's apple a long time ago, but what about the balls?—hmm, I mean eyeballs 😉.

Many “self-proclaimed experts” often claim that the eyes are the ultimate target in female self defense, and it's a mistake not to communicate this way. I’ve received plenty of such comments on my blog. I avoid ranking anything from best to worst, but saying that “eyes are better-forget testicles” is completely untrue; this is just someone's opinion, possibly an attempt to avoid feeling uncomfortable in situations by avoiding discussing the vulnerability of male genitals.

Consider these hard facts about eyes: It is almost impossible to employ anything other than the hand and fingers, and you need to exert precise movement, which can be quite difficult in a tense situation or in the dark. To do so, you still have to move your hand quite high, which can be a problem in close quarters or if he is holding your hands. Those who say testicles are too small targets might forget that eyeballs are also not very large objects; last time I checked, men are not big-eyed mignons 😶. The attacker also doesn’t just stand there; there is a natural protective reflex—he can pry off the hand performing the eye gouge or blink and move away when something comes close to his eyes. Don't you do the same? Attacking eyes might be repulsive for some women, but that can be true for testicles as well.

Play-along tactics, distraction, and deception are often
necessary for the execution of devastating eye attacks. 

Regarding the pros, eyeballs are extremely delicate, highly sensitive sphere organs protected solely by soft eyelids. A successful blow can result in serious outcomes, including intense pain, shock, excessive tearing, disorientation, and possibly temporary or permanent blindness in severe cases. The psychological effect on the attacker is also significant, inducing a fear comparable to losing testicles. 

Nevertheless, the eye sensitivity represents a crucial element in Linda's concept of distraction and deception, which I have already discussed in one part. If an eye attack succeeds, it temporarily stuns him and creates opportunities for follow-up strikes, including targeting our favorite sensitive dangling bits below. The good thing is that there's a convenient distance between the upper and lower parts. He might block one strike, but simultaneously, he's likely to fail to protect the other vulnerable spot, destined for a defeat and possibly losing something even more valuable…

What is rarely discussed is that male eyes are not only important because they are a physically vulnerable organ, but also because they provide sight, which can be easily used to our advantage; to occupy his mind and lower his guard, even increasing the sensitivity of the testicles due to arousal which is associated with increased blood flow into the genitals. Remember, men are extremely visually driven; a trigger of sexual excitement is often necessary to start the sneaky play strategy. Just a quick glance at a woman’s breasts will make him preoccupied and thus a much easier opponent.

Mirabelle plums are excellent eye simulants
for training serious techniques. 

Eye gouging should be performed as a stealthy attack, often by pretending to initiate a kiss or cuddle. Poking with fingers in a V formation can be done when the situation permits, and it must be non-telegraphed. As for other techniques, precise, unexpected, and quick execution is crucial. Training eye-targeting techniques is a serious matter and can be highly dangerous for both parties. As much as we were all for the most realistic training, we didn't want to harm Bob and Peter's beautiful eyes, so Linda secured a realistic rubber head with detailed eyes and a scary expression. It was quite durable equipment, surviving our wildest attacks when we went nuts. 

Like for testicles, she used fruits of appropriate size and texture to mimic the feel of real ones, including texture and resistance before rupture. Litchi fruits would be ideal, but are hard to get. However, Linda's Mirabelle plum tree in her orchard provided plenty of versatile, crushable, disposable training objects. The bigger served as testicles, the smaller as eyes…

 

To mash two potatoes 🥔🥔- introduction to stomping

Among the most brutal techniques of female self-defense are those in which a woman employs her strongest weapons—her legs—against an attacker on the ground. Many commenters asked me about stomping and whether I could make a post about it. This prompted me to do so, as stomping is an incredibly important so-called finishing technique.  Superficially, it might sound straightforward, but it can still be done incorrectly, missing the mark and in the end, compromising successful defense. Initially, I thought it would be just one post, but then I realized there were so many things to be properly communicated and discussed, so I decided to split it into several parts..

The last thing the attacker's testicles see...

Getting an attacker down is one thing, but ensuring he stays there while you make your way out safely is another. This is where stomping techniques come in handy. The prime target is obviously the attacker's testicles, but useful secondary targets include the knees, ankles, Adam's apple, nose, temples, and spine. One commenter posted a clip from a 2024 horror movie, MaXXXine, in which the heroine crushed the testicles of a potential killer with her stiletto heel. This is not just a work of fiction, but a good representation of a possible real scenario, taking advantage of the attacker's vulnerable position and the devastating capability of a spiked high heel.

You can incorporate a grinding movement
at the end, like you want to put out the cigarette bud. 

As I mentioned earlier, Linda often used vivid analogies to help us understand the mechanics of each move. She compared them to the principles of various types of machinery, as well as her favorite kitchen tools and utensils (sometimes quite unusual, I would say). When it comes to stomping, she referred to two metaphors: the drop hammer and the potato masher, which I think are very fitting, don’t you? Unlike front kicks, which require significant upward momentum and long-distance aiming, here, natural strength and weight are used to drop the leg down sharply on the vulnerable target with great force, making it one of the most powerful moves. It’s not just some kind of light stepping or trotting; the leg needs to be raised high and pushed with full force in the downward thrust. "Invite also the gravity to do the job," Linda said. What makes it so deadly is the key principle of pressing the soft target between two very hard surfaces. Plus, at the end, you can incorporate a merciless grinding movement, like putting out a cigarette, to inflict further serious damage, often a multilateral rupture.   

Two potatoes to be mashed together 

In Linda’s visualization, it was like preparing mashed potatoes with a potato masher, vigorously compressing the boiled potatoes between the masher and the bottom of the bowl and using a swirling grinding motion until they turn into a fine mush... just to add some butter, a splash of milk, and salt... a yummy side dish… 😊 Testicles might be a bit tougher than two boiled potatoes, but they are mashable anyway, especially if you use the technique correctly. 

There are several aspects to consider: the position of the attackers, whether he is facing belly down or up, and, of course, your position, how close you are to the attacker, and the availability of vital targets on his body.   As with other techniques, a good command of male anatomy is crucial; it is important to understand the position of testicles and that a sizable penis can provide some inconvenient shielding

The ideal striking area, whether barefoot or wearing light shoes, should be the heel of your foot, supported by a strong calcaneus bone. In some cases, the ball of the foot can also be utilized. When wearing shoes, the entire sole is robust and suitable for striking, but the most effective option is undoubtedly the stiletto heel, which can easily crush or puncture the soft target due to its pointed shape. The attacker's position also affects the choice of action. If he is facing down and exposed, the testicles may rest on the floor, creating a hard backing surface; if he is facing up, the backing is his pubic bone. In this situation, the correct angle is vital—striking just straight down might only impact his pubic area and/or penis.

The stomping technique depends on the position of your attacker. 
(A)  If the attacker is lying face down, you can squash the testicles between the ball of your foot and the ground. 
(B) If the attacker is in the position face up, use your heel and the backing of the pubic bone to squash the testicles. 

The moment he falls, he instinctively spreads his legs to futilely gain balance and soften the impact of landing on his back. Once he is on the ground, initially startled, usually after a hit to his testicles, he instinctively covers his genital area with his hands and presses his thighs together to prevent further danger to his already injured genitals. Here, quickness, precise targeting, and sufficient downward force are essential.  So once he meets the ground in a splayed position, use the first opportunity to execute the strike as quickly and cleanly as possible, without wasting time, yet ensuring it's resolute. If the situation allows, control his legs to keep them apart and the desired target accessible. It might not always be possible; let’s not forget that the principle of distract and destroy applies here as well. Focus your initial strike on another target, and when he moves his hands to the injured area, target his testicles. To create a safe opening, it’s best to stomp on the knee first to tear ligaments, causing him to bend the leg in pain, which provides a convenient opening for you. The most lethal action Linda showed us is to put him in a wheelbarrow position, a deadly hold he can't escape from, and giving you a freeway to his scrotum.  

Usually, the first stomp is all it takes, often sufficient to cause him to pass out and leave him with seriously damaged testes. However, if necessary, perform the move repeatedly with no remorse or hesitation. Once it is clear he is done and you have made some “mashed potatoes”, you can flee. In this case, using Bob and Peter to learn the principle and to aim for the right spot was extremely helpful…and fun. It was heartbreaking to see them lying helplessly on the floor, looking up in despair and hoping our leg flying down would just stop right before contacting their fragile reproductive organs…otherwise…  Luckily, it always ended well for them…and the following training of grinding was then rather a massage of their testicles.  To be continued…
 
 
 

Chopping two gnarls 👋

Two woody gnarls are like two testicles.
These are more difficult to chop, though 

I envy Linda her nice romantic house in the countryside with a large orchard. However, she always told us that besides all the joy, it also comes with hard work. It is not just about collecting the rich harvest, processing and preserving it, or using round and soft gifts of nature as a male organ substitute in her intensive self-defense classes. It takes a lot of time and effort to prune young trees, protect them from pests, remove dead branches, and then take care of the remaining logs, which she uses as firewood. Imagining her, a respected female academic and coach, as an agile lumberjack swinging vigorously with an axe, was mildly amusing. But I guarantee, it was not just her bragging; she is a strong, fit woman of many skills. 

She claimed: I own a high-quality axe with a sharp blade and can split even the thickest log in two with just one precise swing. Some of my trees are already old and often must be cut down completely. I noticed the woody knots or gnarls often resemble one or two balls on a trunk or branch, but unlike those of men, these are extremely hard to split. With the right technique and the properly maintained tools, it can be accomplished without much effort.   

You cannot carry your axe
with you all the time 

The numerous anecdotes, old sayings, and words of wisdom she told us occasionally were not only to bring some cheers but often carried strong metaphors that helped us to grasp the core essentials of her unique concept of female self-defense. Her talking about everyday gardening and care of fruit trees and cooking were no exception. She once told us that in different forms, an axe has been used as a weapon for centuries. Even Amazon warriors are often depicted with an axe. Of course, you cannot carry such an armory with you all the time, but your limbs can serve as a nifty substitute. She told us to imagine our arm as a handle, and our hand as the head of an axe. With such a natural axe you can perform a so-called karate chop or knife hand strike a deadly technique in many martial arts. 

To make a point she even once demonstrated the power of such a blow by breaking a wooden board like a real karate master. Linda left us thinking what if a ball-shaped soft object was put on it, an egg, or an avocado? No doubt such a chop will cause complete obliteration of such a fragile object approximating male gland. 

As always, she provided us with many important details, tips, and tricks and allowed us to put our newly gained knowledge to the test. Let's now look at the bolts and nuts of this technique. Chopping with a hand can be done to any soft target on a male body: temple, nose, Adam's apple, but obviously, the best target is his testicles. In this case, Linda even had a name for it: Testicle Karate Chop, or in short TK-chop.

With a powerful chop you
can break a board or a testicle

 Such a resolute TK-chop to his most sensitive bits with your hand can be quick and unexpected as the hand is already approximately at the height of the groin, so it can be done for instance when caught in a bear hug—rear or front—or for example if being choked or even when freeing another woman from an attacker. 

You can strike forward or backward or even upward depending on your and his position. TK-chop is generally more powerful than a slap, if done correctly it can easily cause some serious testicular injury. Its effectiveness lies in combining a relatively small striking area and quick but powerful momentum. The advantage of TK-chop, as opposed to the classical hammer fist strike, is that the open hand is a narrow yet weighty object and can penetrate through the gap between the legs much more easily, the thighs will guide you precisely towards the desired target so it is hard to miss.

  

The striking area in this case should be the lower or upper ridge of the open straightened hand—ideally, the bony part of the sides of the knuckles. When using the upper part of the hand you should tug your thumb to expose that hard part and bend the fingers a bit. You want to cut through like you want to split through the joint of two sturdy tree branches in one hard swing. You have to gain momentum by swinging your arm in a semi-circle all the way, impacting from below, the back and bottom of his bulge. The best is if the trajectory of your hand is a bit tilted to one side, this way there is a chance of trapping just one testicle. If you hit dead center, between the testicles, still pretty effective, but they get rather separated and pushed to the sides, loosing desired crushing potential. The initial strike will securely stun him allowing you to repeat the move once again or several times and even continue with the finishing move, which can be GPT for instance.

The effectiveness of this TK-chop we could see in real even before actually learning it. Linda actually used it several times on Bob and Peter when they veered from the assigned tasks and training curriculum, got distracted, and started flirting with us or fooling around. Having teenage girls and two horny boys can create an explosive mixture, and for Linda, it was an everlasting challenge to keep the discipline and focus among her squad.  Having fun has to have some limits, especially when you need to achieve some training goals. 

Lucky for Linda and pity for the boys, she always kept one nifty pedagogical tool in her pocket: an occasional TK-chop, with a power depending on the ‘message’ to be delivered as well as the severity of their ‘misconduct’.  Don’t worry she made it obviously mild but still making a point. I remember she once chopped quite hard between Peter's legs from behind so her ‘axe head’ lifted not only the bulky bulge but the whole misbehaver as well.  After recovery he acted like an angel for the rest of the class. Poor boy, lesson learned. Not following Linda's instructions definitely does not pay off…

The Legacy of Shirley Temple - inspirational story #7

We all must learn from the lessons of the past. Unfortunately, some important stories we could learn from are not told loud enough or even at all. With this post, I continue the popular series of inspirational stories to educate and empower.

Shirley Temple in 1941

Despite not considering myself a crazy movie fan, I have always been intrigued by the Hollywood golden era of cinema. In my mind, it was a unique time of excitement, glamour, and cultural boom. I recently read a very interesting biographical article about one of the female movie stars from that era, Shirley Temple. She started acting at a very early age and gained incredible fame. Despite having great success in the movie industry and even in diplomacy, she went through many difficulties in her life. One of the deeply troubling issues in her acting career, she recalled in her memoirs. Being an attractive young actress, she was constantly sexually attacked by powerful executives, producers, and co-workers. It seems the way how it works in the entertainment business: I get sex and you get the job, is apparently a pattern over a century-long and was fully exposed just recently by the MeToo movement. The paradox is, in comparison to the actresses from the modern era, she handled some uncomfortable situations extremely well. I want to share with you an account I took from a media network Ranker.com:

For the entirety of her brief film career, Temple was forced to fight off sexual predators, as she was regularly groped, threatened, and terrorized by men.

After she rebuked one Hollywood producer for his advances, he responded, “Look, I’m going to be a big executive. We’re going to have to get along... What I had in mind was just a workplace formality.”

“It may be in your contract, but not mine,” she replied.

“Sex is like a glass of water,” the man she simply refers to as “Wizard” continued. “You get thirsty, you drink. You want sex, you have it.”

Then there was the beloved comedian George Jessel, who once invited her to his office to “discuss a key role” in his upcoming film:

Lift my skirt without permission, get a knee,
that's how it worked in the golden era of Hollywood. 

We were standing a pace apart, eyeball to eyeball. In one swift movement he opened his trousers and, with a sudden reach, encircled me with one arm… I could feel his other hand groping to lift my shirt. Hard on the heels of the Wizard, this new assault seemed unreal, but little could I do but thrust my right knee upward into his groin... Pain, disgust, and hate flickered across his face, but I felt no mercy. More and more the adult movie business seemed populated with a bunch of copulating tomcats.

Shirley reacted swiftly, responsibly, and resolutely. I assume she had not attended any fancy self defense course and despite that, she was able to handle the situation extremely well. It reminded me of another inspirational story from an actress, I already published some years ago. 

As Shirley said, the asshole deserved no sympathy. Hopefully, he learned his lesson; he could feel lucky she did not use any other more brutal self defense techniques, given his genitals were exposed and in the end did not lose any of his two precious organs. Maybe I would go far with this comment, but I truly think if all young actresses were told how to handle pushy horny men, we could have avoided all those tiring Hollywood sex attack scandals and allegations. What an inspiring story from such a wonderful woman….

P.S.

Some of you wrote me very interesting stories via email and I want to publish them all in this renewed series, just that I must find time to provide the necessary commentary. I ask you for patience.

Interview with Tina

Tina is a busy young female academic doing
controversial but important research. 

In some of my previous posts, I mentioned that Linda is not just a female self-defense trainer, she has a faculty position at the Faculty of Physical Education and besides teaching several courses, and coaching a women’s football team, she also does cutting-edge research in the relatively new but also controversial field of experimental female self-defense. I have been always intrigued and wanted to learn more and make a blog post about it. When I contacted her recently, Linda told me that unfortunately she is going through some medical treatment soon, and the best would be to interview Tina, a recently graduated Ph.D. student in her group, whom I already briefly met once when I was interviewing Linda. I thought it was an excellent idea, so I immediately wrote her an email and arranged a meeting. I was very excited when I met her in her office at the university. She offered me a cup of coffee, I made myself comfortable in an armchair and looked around. Her office looked like a typical working place of a busy young academic; shelves were filled with various books, and on the walls were hanging pictures from meetings and conferences as well as snapshots of training sessions and successful experiments and some medical posters and art. On her desk, she had the most special piece, a detailed plastic anatomy model of male genitals in real size.

One of Tina's office wall decorations.
This art signifies she has to deal with different
penis and testicle types.

It was very enjoyable to meet such an ambitious and knowledgeable young female scientist. Tina is very passionate about her work, and I especially appreciate her openness and transparency about some sensitive topics. The interview with her was an eye-opening experience, and I am sure you will enjoy it as well.

Thank you very much Tina for agreeing to this interview, I think what you and Linda do is quite fascinating but a bit shrouded in mystery. Can you tell us a bit about your research field?

The field I and Linda work in is now called experimental gyneaftoamynology from the Greek words gynaíka - female and aftoámyna - self-defense as a newly established branch of physical education. Its primary aim is to make female self-defense systems most effective through empirical investigations. It means that instead of relying on some anecdotal evidence or unproven theories and assumptions, we put the theories to the test. It is a multidisciplinary discipline, and it combines different aspects from human anatomy and physiology, to psychology, and physical education.

Interesting, so what does your workday look like?

Like all scientists, I am busy from early morning to late afternoon. Basically, I run on coffee… there is always a lot of new literature to read, then I am often occupied with writing manuscripts and reports, filing, and submitting applications for grants and ethics commission approvals, recruiting test subjects, planning, and then, of course doing the experiments…this is what I and Linda like the most. But nothing is easy, and it requires a great amount of commitment and hard work. In the end, it is always so rewarding to get the hard-earned results. Sometimes we must go down the rabbit hole with unexpected outcomes popping up…can be quite thrilling.

What attracted you to this research field and how you made up your decision to do a PhD?

Initially, I wanted to become a high school physical education teacher. In the second year of my study, I was so amazed by Linda’s lectures. She was talking about things I had never heard before, I realized that this is the research that saves lives but hardly makes headlines. As an undergraduate student, I learned about two cases of a sex attack on campus. One sadly ended in rape, and the other one failed as the girl, trained in Karate successfully defended herself.  The ‘poor’ attacker was left with multiple serious injuries including a ruptured testicle after a well-executed Kin Geri. I too was harassed during my first year by a guy and did not know how to properly react. I realized the outcome of a sex attack does not need to be predetermined; a girl can win if she is provided with the right knowledge and skills. To help to drive a paradigm shift in society I embarked on a mission to help Linda use science to equip women with the best knowledge and tools to accomplish their safety in this dangerous world.

What do you think about Linda? How is it to work with her?

I admire her a lot, she is an outstanding scholar, a great supervisor, and a role model for the generation of young female scientists like me. She is a fountain of unconventional ideas. You probably know her, a little bit special personality from the course, she is strict and very demanding but also focused and goal-oriented. One might argue that she occasionally crosses the line or maybe she is too uncompromised when it comes to male test subjects, but it is necessary to reach the desired goal. Not only is the research topic difficult, but she also must cope with many criticisms and obstacles. It is commendable how she can materialize her real-life experience including the time she worked for the SIREN program and that she is not afraid of directly, without any euphemisms to address any awkward topics. She can talk nonchalantly about the details of testicular injuries and eye gouging the same way as about gardening and cake cooking…squeamishness is definitely not in her dictionary. But I guess you know that from the course (Tina was smiling).

You recently defended your doctoral thesis. What is the title and topic?

My thesis has the title Evaluating physical last resort strategies to prevent rape. It covers a thorough investigation and evaluation of the techniques and finding the best strategies for incapacitation the attacker and enabling the victim to flee. We evaluated the effectiveness in targeting all vulnerable points on the male body: eyes, Adam's apple, penis, and testicles. To some extent, I investigated almost all of them, but I mainly focused on my and Linda’s favorite, testicles. As you know there has always been a lot of controversy surrounding these sensitive male organs. You can hear so many conflicting arguments and different pieces of advice, so we wanted to settle this debate once and for all. We wanted to address issues such as: How incapacitating it is, which techniques should be used to a level a woman can cause an injury, and even what is the best method to apply the most secure grasp even when the man has pants on. Now, we can confidently claim, that the success of targeting testicles is much higher than previously admitted, we have solid proof and evidence it simply works in many different situations and is highly incapacitating. I hope with our outcomes we put the long-standing debate to an end. However, we found out that, to achieve success, women must be taught these things properly without any reservation, and they must practice regularly as the automatic, correct, and right-moment execution of the techniques is crucial.

How did you find out? Can you tell us about your experiments?

Well, there were many, but I can tell you about one very interesting experiment in which we had two groups of female students. The control group was not taught any physical techniques, and the other test group was provided with detailed comprehensive information on the male anatomy and the vulnerable points of the male body, and how to injure those. Pretty much they were taught the same things as you were in the course. They could even practice some techniques on silicone testicles (We will talk about it later).

Many female participants report an empowering experience that they
share with their peers and express willingness to come back

We arranged a simulated scenario when they had to subdue a man attacking her. The first group's success rate was app. 20%, quite low in comparison to the second group for which the success rate went through the roof, reaching 70%. It was hilarious to see all those young guys on the floor clutching their anguished groins. We even had some medical emergencies, but luckily no permanent injuries, just some bruising and swelling of the scrotums. Sometimes we even had to step in to stop overenthusiastic women in their rage to prevent harm to male subjects. We calculated we could reduce the incidence the rape by at least half if we properly teach young women these techniques. This shows the barriers are not that difficult to break, we just need to find a better way how to empower women instead of saying: You are weak sex, live with it…and all that bullshit…excuse my language. It was amazing to see the ladies leaving the room with great confidence, evidently empowered, bragging about their new skills and ‘injuries’ they were able to cause on male organs when chatting with the other group…and the knowledge of newly gained power was transferred.

That’s quite fascinating. Any other experiment?

Part of my thesis was to find the best way to attack testicles with a hand in different situations on clothed or naked attackers. A serious issue, but I cannot recall having other times such great fun. We had two guys, with distinct types of scrotum: tight and loose. They exchanged different underwear and pants and of course, at some point, they had to undress completely. We had to cope with frequent unwanted erections, faints, intermittent screams, importantly also ‘Eureka’ moments. One female participant satisfied she finally managed to apply a secured lock on a tight scrotum, exclaimed: ‘Now is the time to test the best method for testicular rupture!’ The other girls around laughed, and the poor boys cringed. Well, it could be an interesting activity, but we cannot afford to put their delicate reproductive organs at such risk. Sometimes, the screams combined with loud laughter from our lab can be heard in the hallways, and we have people knocking on the door, being horrified, and asking what’s going on…Well, that’s the price of doing such innovative research. Now Linda can go to the course and teach you confidently what should you do when a filthy scrotum appears close to your hand.  

I would expect it to be difficult to get volunteers for your experiments, isn’t it? How do you attract them?

We recruit both female and male test subjects among faculty students; male subjects are usually semi-professional athletes. We prefer young fit men, with a good physique. It is telling to see their strength is in vain when applying the right techniques to the core of their masculinity. Before admission, they have to go through a rigorous selection process and we do not accept everybody. We look at the size and type of their pressure points including their genitals to account for as many variables as possible.

Male participants are selected from faculty students
based on different parameters. Muscular physique and
types of their genitals are some of them. 

And what does attract them? Surprisingly, there is no shortage of volunteers. Linda made several funny recruitment ads (Tina pointed at the posters on the wall with interesting graphics and text ‘We need your balls’), but I don’t think this is the reason. The motivations of the participants are diverse and differ between males and females. They usually get some ECTS points for volunteering and some small monetary compensation. I think many of them come out of curiosity and sometimes guys make a bet with their pals, or they are convinced it is just a prank and at the end, they are often unpleasantly surprised. The shock often comes the moment we ask them to expose themselves for genital evaluation. But that’s the game we play. They must sign a waiver and we brief them about what kind of participation we expect. Surprisingly many come back and want to participate again, even without any reward. Female participants often in the final questionnaire account for how empowering experience it was to participate in the project, and whether there is an opportunity to help more. Interestingly, since we started our research, we noticed fewer rape attempts reported here than other faculties. 

What is the most difficult part of doing the experiments?

Sometimes the experimental part is very demanding and not a piece of cake for the experimenter as well as a female, or male participant. First, we must break common barriers such as squeamishness, prudence, and shyness but we also must consider safety. The experimental setup inevitably involves handling bare genitals and causing pain, which can't be avoided. We often must repeat an experiment several times, even if we see the male subject cannot take it anymore. Simply we need enough repetitions to make a solid statistical conclusion. But how else would you answer the question of whether a particular technique is effective or not, without actually performing it in real? Some interesting questions were posted by your blog readers, regarding for instance the type of testicles and different situations that need to be investigated. But we always weigh the benefits and possible risks. Nevertheless, I admit some experiments can be fun and bring a lot of satisfaction in case of positive outcomes.

I heard from Linda about one unfortunate experiment when a volunteer ended up in the hospital can you tell us more about it?

So-called freezing is often considered a common problem in female self-defense. We wanted to investigate this phenomenon closely, so we simulated an unexpected hyperrealistic attack on me. I did not know when and where it was going to happen. One of our volunteers Mike, played out an attacker in the dark parking lot when I was leaving the campus. Maybe because I undertook training I did not freeze and reacted the best I could. A sharp elbow rear jab and a swift back kick with my heel did the ‘intended job’. The ‘attacker’ unfortunately…well if in real life fortunately…ended up in hospital with a broken rib and contusion in his left testicle. He recovered through but did not want to participate in our research anymore, which was a pity. I liked Mike a lot, he was a very useful male test subject.

I admit it was enjoyable when we trained with Bob and Peter. However, many women cannot train male partners. What is for example the best simulant of testicles or eyes? You already mentioned the silicone model...

Training self-defense and proper targeting of vulnerable points such as testicles or eyes is undoubtedly difficult. Of course, a real set of testicles is the best, but not always available so some realistic models help. In a small project, we tested different everyday objects and compared them to testicles, on all parameters including the texture and pressure necessary to cause rupture. We can recommend lemons and limes. These fruits are readily available in all grocery stores and when squeezing all the juice out, is a good exercise for gaining finger strength… of course, they are also a great source of vitamins as well. Plums and small apricots are also suitable analogs because of their right texture, shape, and size. As for the eyes, the gooseberries are excellent but sometimes hard to get. We sought to develop something more durable and nondisposable so we recently collaborated with a urologist from a nearby clinic Dr. Lane, and developed a prototype of a very true-to-life durable simulant of male genitals for some hardcore training. She provided us with critical parameters and valuable advice on anatomy and variables. No one knows better male genitals than someone handling them every day (Tina reached for the peculiar object and handed it to me for inspection. It was indeed almost like the real piece).

Realistic silicone models are being developed
for female self-defense training.

This thing is made from high-quality durable silicone and contains hard rubber testes with the same resistance as real glands with detailed plumbing attached including epididymis and spermatic cord. No death pinch will ever fail! With this strap, it can be easily fastened to common leather-kicking dummies and is perfectly sanitizable so can be used for training biting techniques as well. Linda has a pair of these and is going to use them in her course. We contacted some silicone molding companies for mass production, but all showed no interest, luckily, we found one with a female CEO who was very enthusiastic and wanted to help even without any financial profit, so I hope we can get it on the market soon.

I guess you need some ethics approval and what about funding such research?

That’s right, we have to apply for the ethics commission approvals, and it is always a pain in the ass. In the last couple of years, we have been lucky because of our female dean, who has been very supportive of our cause and not afraid to accommodate controversial research topics and ideas at the faculty. She clearly understands the significance and impact of the field and that the path to the results is challenging and not well-trodden. Without her, I have a doubt we could continue our work.

Not only ethics approvals, but it is also extremely difficult to get sufficient funding because of the contentious and neglected topic. We regularly receive a lot of harsh criticism, mainly from male management and application reviewers. We even get a type of response: Why does she need funding, all she does is squeeze testicles all day long, what kind of research is that? Damn, how ignorant! (Tina was visibly upset)

I heard you also gather and evaluate the data from real-life situations...

Testicles can swell to the size of oranges
after some proper 'treatment'.

Indeed, experiments are just part of our activities and medical and police reports are a very valuable source of data. We gather and review those and critically evaluate and statistically process all cases, both successful and unsuccessful. We also perform interviews with women with experience in such situations. It is interesting how many success cases go unnoticed by the press and media, which is a pity. Dr. Lane provided us with some valuable data from the emergency cases she encountered while working at the urology ER. I have seen pictures of attackers' genitals significantly ‘modified’ as a result of a successful counterattack. Not for the fainthearted, but quite telling. I did not know a scrotum could swell to the size of an orange. Dr. Lane said the best rapist deterrent would be to post them everywhere.

What are you working on right now and what are your plans for the future?

At the moment, I am writing a paper with a tentative title Glands and Glans - from neglect to focus.  It will be a more sociological/historical study of how perceptions of male genitals in the context of female self-defense have changed throughout history and what were the implications for the era. I would like to stay in academia and continue researching some novel innovative techniques Linda proposed; they all sound brutal and effective but at the same time very exciting to explore. I also have ideas about some unconventional methods for distraction and deception, which we can develop and evaluate on volunteers. But it all depends on the funding and whether we continue to receive positive support from our dean.

Thank you, Tina, for this interesting interview, I wish you a lot of success in your scientific endeavors!

How my knee met Bob's testicles

I got a feeling there was nothing more controversial than when I wrote that during the course Linda allowed us to test our freshly obtained self defense skills on Bob and Peter not wearing any protection, leading to an unfortunate accident when my knee ‘met’ Bob’s testicles in a quite unpleasant way. Linda sought to provide us with the unique possibility of getting as much realism in our training as possible, which is simply impossible with heavy groin guards and padding. It wasn't a piece of cake for either of us, but luckily nobody sustained any real injury, although sometimes it was a close call. I would say it was a miracle, given the seriousness and brutality techniques we learned and the ferocity with which we tested them on the two boys.

Looking back this was the Lindas course's added value and the uniqueness of her approach greatly helped us build our confidence and empowerment. Exploring the male body and its weaknesses on our own and ‘learning by doing’ was part of Linda’s pedagogical philosophy which made the course very special and effective (unfortunately also controversial).

When our training endeavor was approaching the end, we became increasingly proficient in whole action sequences, not only knowing how to attack testicles properly even till the point of their rupture but also other sensitive spots: eyes, Adam’s apple, knees, penis, and even the coccyx.

I did not realize the young guy in the hood
having me in a bear hug was Bob. 

Ultimately Linda gave the boys instruction to realistically play out a vicious attack on each of us that would come in surprise; we did not know when and where this try-out would happen. Bob and Peter were told not to hold back and act like real attackers and we were supposed, not to pull any punches in our response. This was the occasion to show our mastered reflexes, our situational awareness, our ability to unleash what’s inside us, what we have learned, and whether we can use it when needed. This concept scrutinized our readiness for the dangerous real-life world.

The day the unfortunate incident happened—it was late afternoon—I was coming back from lectures and was excited for the class, to have fun with other girls and Bob and Peter. This time I came in a bit early. The hallways towards the dojo were long, shady, and quite creepy but I confidently walked through and was about to enter the dojo when it happened out of the blue. Suddenly two strong hands wrapped around me putting me in a tight bear hug. I got completely immobilized and my hands were pinned. Because it was dark at that spot and the person was wearing a hoodie, I could not see who it was, but my strength was no match to his.

After the initial shock, the adrenaline and training just kicked in, and thanks to God, I did not freeze. I made a quick plan in my head; some of my strong body weapons were not blocked. In the first step, I made a sharp head-butt to startle him and to loosen his hold a bit, which was followed by a sharp knee strike. I could not see the target so it was like a shot in the dark, I just hoped my knee would be guided by his thighs toward the intended target. But it was not a perfect shot, I could not feel the softness of his genitals. So, I quickly re-aimed for the following attempt, this time I went deeper between his legs, and voilà, the striking zone landed perfectly. His thin fabric shorts offered no protection, and I could feel I was forcefully compressing one of his testicles between the pelvic floor and my knee as I was lifting him. My kneeing concert continued. The second time I tilted the trajectory a bit, so the other male egg got equal treatment, and as Linda said don’t forget there is also willy, so I went with my knee also right in the middle, so all three friends down there were treated equally. This time my lower thigh greeted the tip of his penis, while its two eggy friends just got only a friendly whack from my patella.

The attacker’s reaction was as expected, he bent over and let me go. I followed by a sharp chop to his neck which just accelerated him to the ground.

Breathing heavily, in a dissipated adrenaline rush I looked down on the young man's muscular body, which was now folded, kneeling, holding his manhood, and cursing. I was just about to conclude the defense sequence with a resolute finishing move - a toe punt kick to the sweet spot below his butt cheeks where the back of his ball sack was exposed by his position. Luckily, before doing that, I just realized the guy on the floor was one of our darling attackers—poor Bob! I was horrified… Shit… I squatted next to him. “Are you OK?!” I asked him, but he just shook his head in clear anger.

I put his head in my lap and made him comfortable. 

“Let me help,” I wrapped his arm around my shoulder and assisted him to get on his feet. He limping, and I supporting him, we got inside the dojo. I let him lie on the bench and relax. I allowed him to spread his legs to remove any unnecessary pressure on the agitated spot and put a small pillow below to provide some cushion. To further ease the pain, I fetched an icepack from the kitchenette and helped him to place it gently on his anguished groin, sat next to him, let his head rest in my lap so he gets the best comfort possible, and affectionately went with my hand inside his blond curly hair, ruffling it a bit.

“Do they ache, Bob?” I wanted to break a bit of awkward silence.

Should not have asked, his reproach glance at me talked by itself. “Of course, they ache, stupid me,” thought to myself.

“I am sorry,” I whispered to his ears, even though we were not supposed to eat humble pie in this situation as we would not do it for a real attacker.

Ice packs are essential equipment
for female self defense classes. 

As a sign of my attentiveness, I pulled up his T-shirt halfway and started rubbing his pubic region with my hand. Not sure if it helped or not but at least I was doing something. Seeing and touching his naked body I realized how ripped he was. Why he wouldn't, he was a student of PE doing many sports and exercising daily. Bad thoughts started to flow into my head, and I became troubled there could be some serious testicular damage, a rupture, or torsion. This was not far-fetched we learned how to knee perfectly with the ability and intention to do such damage. This was the moment I was a bit angry with Linda she let this happen and put the boys' ability to produce testosterone and sperm and being such young hunks in jeopardy. Was it worth it for the sake of our training? I let the readers of this blog decide...

The almost idyllic moment was disrupted by someone who stood over us. It was Linda.

“What happened?” she asked.

“We just had a small ‘accident’ with Bob during a mock attack. I am unharmed and free, but Bob’s balls took their toll.” I answered guiltily.

From the look on her face, it was not clear whether she was happy I could defend myself successfully in a realistic scenario or she was dissatisfied that Bob was put out of action and now cannot ‘serve’ as an attacker for other girls impatiently waiting to learn male anatomy and practice their self defense skills.

“I worry, it might be serious, and he needs to see a doctor.” I conveyed my worries to her.

“OK, let me check,” Linda replied.

Without any explanation or asking for approval she quickly slipped her hand into Bob’s shorts. The examination wasn’t very gentle as Bob at some point yelped and shook a bit. It seemed she was palpating the glands meticulously but also vigorously, checking for any signs of trauma: bruising, hematoma, torsion, or rupture. She then removed her hand from the shorts, and I was anxiously waiting for the outcome.

“Well yes, I see there is indeed a serious problem… it seems our Bob is a lazybone and wants to shun today’s class,” and with the same hand she just seconds before probed his male organs gently slapped his cheek and a bit mischievously added “Isn’t it like that, Bob?”

Then she changed her tone to serious. “Don’t worry Wendy, no emergency, when he is fine, just bring him back. I planned a lot of things for you today, and the girls are impatiently waiting.”

Testicular examination is like probing
fragile eggs for any cracks. 

When she left, I could not resist thinking of doing the testicular check by myself. Not that I did not trust Linda, but I had the urge to take Bob's bag in the palm of my hand and probe the oval testes with my fingertips on the whole surface, to completely relieve my concerns. But I was hesitating to do my investigation because of the already rough handling of Bob’s testicles first by my knee and then by Linda’s hand.  

Before I could do it Susanne showed up and brought a glass of water and a pill. She handed it to Bob, but before that, she humorously commented. “Seems the dangerous attacker once again got what he deserved!” But she was nice, she advised us on remedies to mitigate the testicular pain, some were quite weird such as rubbing the toes! Again, not sure if it proved a magic cure but it was fun.

To my pleasure, she also suggested doing the genital examination under her supervision, so I do not feel guilty and can do it correctly. “We learn how to damage testicles but should also know how to heal them, or at least make an informed decision whether to see professional help” she winked at me.

I caressed Bob's head kindly and asked for permission.  He agreed. It was a strange feeling. Susanne gave me, a dummy on this topic, a thorough guidance on how I should palpate the testicles and what signs and irregularities I should look for. “Handle them like fragile two eggs you examine for a crack. Not as good as ultrasound, but our sensitive fingers can do the job as well,”  she said.

We also pulled down his shorts and inspected the testicles visually, and although they looked a bit swollen and with a blue hue, Susanne assured me there was no indication of hematoma, the icepack should provide sufficient relief and the pain should go away in a couple of minutes.

Indeed, after some time, Bob showed signs of recovery, and I decided to follow Linda’s order to bring him back to business.  A little bugger, he was truly lazy, acting like being glued on the bench and not willing to get up so I had to use a mild enforcing technique like swinging my hand above his bulge to warn him what could happen if he did not follow my demands. Then I made a mock GTP movement in the air and asked him “Bob, you don’t want to be pulled to the class, do you?” This worked perfectly and he slowly moved out of his ‘den’. 

In the following days, I was often rewinding the moments of the incident, the initial shock and adrenaline rush, the tenderness of the orbs being crushed, and how impactful my technique was on a much stronger young guy. It was a very strange but at the same time, empowering experience and I am a bit ashamed to say I wanted to go through it again… Was it all Linda’s plan?… Who knows...